Stuff I've done this year:

Hello again my dears.  Not the next day perhaps, but probably sooner than you expected!

Before we start, here's a very quick update on Stephen and his eye issues - He has now had cataract surgery on both eyes.  His right eye has healed very well, giving him almost perfect distance vision in that eye for the first time since he was a child.  He does need glasses for anything closer than the TV, but fortunately over the counter glasses are adequate for allowing him to read, or use a computer.  He only had surgery on his left eye 2 days ago, so he's still finding that pretty uncomfortable, but he can see through it about as well as he expected.  The retina of his left eye is permanently damaged due to how long it took for him to have that tear repaired, so he's never going to have perfect vision in that eye.  Next week we should find out exactly how effective this last surgery has been, and assuming all is well, in a few weeks he will be able to get proper prescription glasses, and then we can declare him fixed!  

So, now it's time for all of the regulars, and do bear in mind that this is 5 months worth of work, and 5 months worth of yarn purchases!  

I will say, I'm not including anything from The Wool Monty, which I attended last weekend, as I'm planning on including a more comprehensive review of my day there in my next update.

FO's

First of all is a project that I actually finished knitting over a year ago, but I couldn't really call it finished until I'd blocked it:

Celestarium circular shawl, in dark purple yarn, with gold beads, draped over several picture frames against a white wall.

I can't find a way to show this off properly, mostly because Finn has to investigate if I lay it out flat!  So I've gone for draping it over the frames of pictures in our living room!

This is a shawl that depicts the major stars of the northern hemisphere, picked out with gold beads.  I started knitting it in 2016, but stopped when my step-mam began her final decline due to Lung cancer, and dad was diagnosed with Pancreatic cancer.  I picked it up again last year, and finished it, but I didn't have access to my blocking mats at the time.  Without blocking, the full beauty of this really doesn't show.  It looks so much better now, even if I can't take a decent photo of it!

The pattern is Celestarium, by Audry Nicklin, with edging from French CanCan, by Mademoiselle C. The yarn is Sparkleduck Galaxy, in the shade "Figgy Pudding", and the beads are size 6/0 galvanised gold myuki round beads.

Skein Austen t-shirt, with knitted lace at the neck and sleeves.

I love the t-shirt designs by SkeinHead, but in general, I hate the neckline of most t-shirts.  So I've taken to cutting a much wider neckline, and embellishing it with knitting, or crochet.  

It seems to be effective, as it turns a basic t-shirt, into something much fancier.  I wore this to The Wool Monty last weekend, and I received so many comments and compliments on it!

The lace pattern that I chose was from The Magic of Shetland Lace Knitting, by Elizabeth Lovick, and the yarn was superwash sock, by Mothy and the Squid, in the colourway "Water like a stone".

Finn the cocker spaniel, wearing a red and black doggy coat

Finn already had a couple of doggy coats, one that we bought for him, and one that I knitted for him, but both are quite awkward to get on and off.  Since we don't put these on him for the cuteness factor, but in an attempt to protect him from excessive baths, by protecting his belly fur from mud, having a garment that is difficult to get off, and that you expect to be covered in mud when you're trying to get it off, is not exactly fun.  So I designed a really simple coat that will cover most of his belly, but can also be easily removed just by undoing a few buttons.

There's nothing fancy to it, a ribbed collar that slips over his head, a wide back panel with a single cable running down the centre, a little bit of shaping at the end, and a ribbed border at the bottom. Then a slimmer panel from the neck to his belly, that fits between his front legs, and fastens with a few buttons on each side.  I chose a yarn that has a highly reflective strand running through it for the main body of the coat, as this makes Finn much easier to see on a dark and wet night.  Although he also has a light up collar that we always put on him when we walk him in the dark, just to be safe.

I could write the pattern up if anyone would like me to, but I've no particular plans to do so at present.

The yarns are King Cole Big Value Chunky, in shade 554 - Black, and Schachenmyer Lumio, in shade 32 - dark red.

Crocheted pouch bag

Finn likes to "help" us unload the car whenever we've been anywhere, especially the supermarket.  If we don't give him something to carry into the house, he will steal something.  Usually bread, or crisps.  These things rarely reach their intended destination in pristine condition!

So I came up with this idea of making him a little pouch bag, that we could put a doggy treat in, and whenever he tries to help with the shopping, we can give him his own little bag to carry, and save our bread from tooth marks!

It's just a pair of granny squares, sewn together on 3 sides, lined with a scrap of cotton fabric, and fastened with a bit of ribbon, but it's effective... when we remember to take it with us anyway!

The yarn is Stylecraft Special Double Knit, in the colourways "Peony" and "Charcoal".

Hand knitted socks in orange, purple, pink, and grey stripes, on the feet of a white person with fat ankles.

It's rare that I don't have socks on my needles. They make the perfect portable project.  I started these while I waited for a physio appointment in February.  As they were for me, I didn't worry about making a perfectly matching pair, but they're not that far off.

My usual sock pattern, and the yarn is King Cole ZigZag, in the colourway "Dragonfly".

Chunky crocheted red basket

Many, many years ago, when I first picked up knitting again as an adult, I designed for myself a chunky red cardigan.  I bought the yarn, a super-bulky cotton, then I started knitting it.  I quickly discovered that my fingers and wrists do not like knitting with chunky yarn and large needles, or with cotton.  The project was left awaiting completion for so long that it became almost legendary.  

This year, I decided to give up on ever finishing that cardigan.  The chances are it wouldn't fit me anymore anyway, or at least not the way I wanted it to.  Looking at the yarn though, I thought it would be perfect for making crocheted storage baskets.  And I was right!

I can work with cotton when I'm crocheting.  I don't know what it is about the process that makes it so much less painful than knitting with cotton.  I can also manage chunky yarn and a big fat crochet hook, although I did have to add a disability grip handle to the hook after a while. But I'm really pleased with how this turned out!  It's just made of lots and lots of single crochet stitches.

This one is being used to store Finn's toys.  At first he wasn't impressed, and as soon as I put everything away in it, he picked it up and dragged everything back out of it all over the living room rug, but after a few days he started leaving it alone, and only picking out what he wanted from the top.

The yarn is Sirdar Denim Ultra, in colourway "0657".  I can't say that it's likely to still be available I'm afraid though, as this has been in my stash for roughly a decade!

Bright stripy socks, in orange, yellow, red, purple, and green

Stephen seems to have great difficulty in maintaining control of his socks.  He blames Finn, but I don't seem to lose mine at the same sort of rate, so either Finn just prefers to steal Stephen's socks, or Stephen leaves his socks in a position where they are easy to steal more than I do!

Before I sorted out the dumping corner of our bedroom, Stephen was bemoaning the loss of many knitted socks.  So I started knitting him more.  He chose these colours.  I'm not sure he realised just how bright they actually are, as this was after his cataracts had started to become a problem, and one of the things that cataracts do is affect your perception of colours.  I don't know if he's worn these ones since his operations...

Of course, I located Finn's secret stash of hoarded socks, pants, toys, and other random items under an old duvet when I sorted the bedroom in preparation for the new wardrobe.  So now Stephen is no longer lacking in hand knitted socks.

The yarn for these is King Cole ZigZag, in the colourway "Bumble Bee".

Dark purple faux cable knit leg warmers

After I'd finished knitting Stephen's super bright socks, I was, if I'm being honest, procrastinating about knitting a complicated lace shawl.  I wasn't really in the right mental state for complex lace work.  So I dug another skein out of deep stash, and started making these leg warmers.  Although, they're only half for keeping my legs warm in winter, they're also for preventing stinging and biting creepy crawlies from getting up my trouser legs when I walk Finn at the end of Summer!  I always seem to be the tastiest thing around for every midge and mosquito, and walking through the long grass will always result in my legs looking like the King of the Mountains jersey.  Even writing this is making my legs itch!

Again, nothing complicated about them, just ribbed cuffs, and a faux cable pattern for the mid sections.  I did misjudge how much yarn I'd used, and how much I would need for the second one, so I did end up unpicking part of the first one in order to liberate enough yarn to make them match.  Entirely my own fault for not weighing the yarn and separating it into 2 matching sized balls before I started.  I can't really call it a mistake, it was pure laziness on my behalf.

The yarn I used for these was Pasku Pirkkalanka, by Taito Pirkanmaa, in shade "Dark Purple".  It's another that I've no idea if it's still available anywhere, as it's been in my stash since 2013, and I got it as a destash from a friend!  If you're looking for something similar, it's a Finnish pure wool, worsted weight yarn.

Macramé plant hanger being used to hold a large jar full of buttons 

My final finished object so far this year is a craft that I'd never tried before a few weeks ago.

Stephen's mum was given a plant by a friend, and it's one of those types of plants that trails.  Another of her friends suggested that she should get a macramé hanger for it, or, and this was still her friend talking, she could ask me if I could make one for her, as she was sure I would be able to.

Curious to see if macramé is a craft I can work with, I bought myself a cone of appropriate cord, and a few wooden rings and beads, watched a bunch of tutorial videos on YouTube, and gave it a go.

Close up shot of my macramé work

I'm genuinely quite pleased with how most of this came out!  My crown knots weren't as neat as I'd have liked them to be, but my half square knot spirals, beads, and square knots all came out beautifully!

Josephine Knot

This is what I'm most proud of though, I learned how to work a Josephine knot, and they're lovely!

Macramé seems to be one of those crafts that's currently on the rise, and as an aesthetic the bohemian 1970's look that goes with macramé artefacts on display in your home seems to also be quite popular right now.  So maybe I'll do more of this craft at some point.  I don't think it will become a favourite craft though.

I made this design up off the top of my head, simply combining a few knots that I'd watched tutorials for, and to be honest, I haven't a clue how a macramé pattern would be written anyway!

The "yarn" is JollyEst Natural Macrame Cotton Cord.

WIPs

There's far fewer of these, so don't panic!  Although this section does include projects that I've worked on since December, but that I'm not necessarily actively working on right now.

A king sized bed with a partially complete mitred squares knitted blanket covering almost half of it.

This is how I left my Mitred Squares Blanket when I finally put it away at the end of winter.  As the weather gets warmer, it becomes more and more uncomfortable to be working with a growing wool blanket in your lap.  Right now I can barely manage a cushion cover in my lap, so this always gets put away over the summer, and comes back out again once I've finished any Christmas knitting I might have planned.

I reckon I'm currently about a third of the way through this blanket.  I think I may already have enough mini-skeins and scraps to finish it too!  Although I'm still not 100% certain about how I'm going to finish it off.  Originally I'd planned on a black border to square off all of the pointy edges of the squares, but I don't know if I'm still going to do that.  I probably have another few years left before I finish it though, so I don't need to worry too much about that just yet.

The pattern is the Mitred Square Blanket by LuAnn Krug, and the yarns are a vast array of different sock yarns, both commercial, and indie dyed, left overs from other projects, and mini-skeins.

The beginnings of a lace shawl in a green to purple gradient yarn

This is the shawl that I'm procrastinating about by knitting other things.  It's a truly gorgeous pattern, and stunning yarn, but it's formed in modules, that you work together in a number of repeats that will produce the exact design you want, and will use most of your yarn, without leaving you at risk of failing at Yarn Chicken.  It's perfect for gradient yarn, because you don't need to worry about finishing before the gradient has run its course.  But of course this modular design means I have to think, and plan, and do maths.  That on top of the fact that lace work isn't the sort of knitting that you can do while half asleep in front of the TV.  Most of my knitting right now has to be the sort that can be done while half asleep, as I'm permanently knackered, and my brain has space only for regular chores, and keeping track of progress in Eye-mageddon.

My friend Becky is/has been making this shawl too, so I thought it would be nice to make it along with her.  Instead I've been a terrible friend, not just to Becky, but to most of my friends, as I've just disappeared into my own little world, desperately trying to keep hold of some shred of sanity, while not dropping the ball on looking after Stephen, or medical appointments galore.

When I pick this project back up again, it will be a sign that I'm feeling better.  Less stressed, less overwhelmed.

The pattern is Wood-Nymph, by a Catnach, and the yarn is Bluefaced Leicester & silk Gradient Lace, by Natali Stewart, in the colourway "Sea Thistle".

The beginnings of a purple jumper

You can tell that I'm doing better at knitting from stash, because this is another yarn that I got from a friend's destash, and another pattern that's been in my queue for years.

This is the beginnings of a jumper for myself, one with a deep V-neck, and a general style that I'm hoping will be reasonably flattering on me.  Although I will of course have to wear something underneath it, otherwise it will just be indecent.

The pattern is Poet's Pullover, by Ashley Knowlton, and the yarn is Rowan Organic Wool DK, in the colourway "Purple".

Monochrome mitred squares

I spoke about barely being able to cope with a cushion cover earlier, and this is what I was talking about.  One cushion remains without a suitable cover in our living room.  I don't know why, but I decided that I would make this one entirely in shades of grey, black, and white.  

Some of the greys are a little bluish, or a little greenish, but in general it seems to work reasonably well. 

The plan is that the front of the cushion will be this collection of little squares in different yarns, but the back will be just one big square.  Only 2 seams should need to be sewn, as all of the rest will be picked up and knit.

The pattern is derived from the Mitred Square Blanket listed above, and the yarns are mostly Opal mini-balls, with a few indie dyed mini-skeins, and a few scraps from larger balls of commercial sock yarn.

Stash Acquisition

Let's start with Made by Penguins.  Technically, I'm still receiving yarn from the Little Penguin subscription box each month.  Except for the fact that since shortly after Christmas, Lisa has closed down the shop in order to move house, set up a new studio, and recover from a massive EDS flare.  She's now fully installed in her new home, and studio, and is feeling much better, so we're expecting the shop to reopen very soon!  In the mean time, Lisa has still been sending her subscribers yarn that she dyed in advance, just sometimes she's been waiting and sending a few months all at once.  I'm telling you this so that you'll understand why there isn't a nice neat little box shot for each month.

December 21, January 22, and Flower Power Fund mini-skeins

The last bit of dying that Lisa did before she closed her shop was for the Flower Power Fund - a small fundraising event in aid of Marie Curie care.  I would have gladly bought every set of mini-skeins that Lisa created for this event, had I the money to spare!  Instead I ordered one, but Lisa being Lisa, she sent me some extras, and asked me to donate to Marie Curie as and when I had the money to spare. She also sent my December and January subscription yarns in the same box, and a few crochet hooks too!  You can imagine how confused I was when this comparatively enormous box appeared on my doorstep!

The crochet hooks are perfect for stuffing into a project bag with a few mini-skeins to be an "emergency" project.  Lisa understands this entirely, being a fellow "Spoonie", she knows how easy it is to find yourself sat in a hospital waiting room for hours on end without warning.  When I explained that I have a hospital bag permanently made up, with PJs, slipper socks, a toothbrush and comb, puzzle books, charging cable, 3 days worth of meds, and an emergency project in it, she revealed that she has exactly the same thing!

February Little Penguin box - magenta

March Little Penguin box - purples, and greens

In March, Lisa explained that the disruption of moving house and setting up her new studio would last a bit longer than she'd hoped it would, and sent her subscribers a big thank you for sticking with her.  As well as extra yarn in truly gorgeous colours, and free crochet patterns!

April, May, & June - pinks, yellows, turquoise, and blues

By the end of May, the new studio was ready, but the new house still didn't have internet connection!  It's difficult to launch a new web shop without internet, but at least Lisa could get back at the dye pots!  I can't wait to see what she has in store for us next month!

Cloudborn yarn

I needed some 4.5mm short tips for working the faux cable section of my leg warmers, and the only place that I could find that had them in stock was LoveCrafts, but they also sell lots of lovely yarn, and it seemed sad to be buying something that barely cost as much as the postage!  So I added this skein of Cloudborn Fibres Highland Superwash Sock Twist, in the colourway "Slate Heather", thinking it would do for the back of the monochrome mitred square cushion cover.

Macramé kit

I wasn't sure if I should include this or not, because strictly speaking, it's cord rather than yarn, but it is being stored in my stash, so I guess it counts!

JollyEst Natural Macramé cotton cord, plus wooden beads and rings.

Monochrome sock yarns

I was utterly convinced that I had at least half a dozen monochrome Opal mini's, but when I went through my stash I could only find 3 or 4.  While each one can be used several times in the same project, I didn't think I would have enough to finish the 49 squares that I predicted I would need. So I ordered a couple of full size balls of sock yarn in monochrome colours, and 3 Opal mini's from A Bit Woolly.  Their Opal mini's are randomly coloured, but you can tell them what you like, and they will do their best to provide them.  I explained what I was buying the mini's for, and not only did they send me all monochrome colours, they sent me an extra mini as well!

Cloudborn and Regia yarns

My estimate of 50g of yarn for the back of the monochrome cushion was very wrong!  Even 100g is going to involve a Yarn Chicken moment I think!  When I realised my mistake, I went back to the LoveCrafts site, and tried to order another skein of the Slate Heather colourway. Sadly all but one colourway had sold out, and there was only one skein of that colourway remaining too!  Fortunately for me, it was another beautiful shade of grey, this one is called "Charcoal Heather".  I think that with some effort it can be made to work with the darker grey on the back of the cushion.  

While I was on the site, I spotted this beautiful purple and pink colourway of Regia 4-ply.  I'm always going to have a use for purple sock yarn!

As I was writing this section up, I was worrying that I may have failed already at my goal of knitting more than I buy this year.  Then I remembered that this is 5 months worth of yarn, so it's not as terrible as it looks at first glance!  This works out at approximately 2300m of yarn added to my stash, and Ravelry thinks that I've used 3817m so far, so actually, I'm not doing too badly at all!

Knitting Adjacent

In 2019, I realised that going up to Shetland to visit the Out-Laws, and to drop in on Shetland Wool Week, would be much more difficult, if not impossible, since we'd adopted Finn. There's no way that we would leave him in a kennel in the hold of the ship!  So I asked Stephen's mum if they happened to be in Lerwick during Wool Week, if she could pick up a few bits and pieces of merchandise for me, especially the Annual.

Shetland Wool Week 2019 booty

She managed to get me a tote bag, celebrating 10 years of Shetland Wool Week, a selection of button badges depicting 6 of the iconic yearly hat patterns, and of course a copy of the Annual.  

The intention of course, had been that she bring these things down when they came to visit in spring 2020, but we all know how that turned out!  Fortunately, Stephen's parents are organised enough that they remembered to bring them when they finally got to come and visit us this year.

This year though, we have learned that the ferry company have started to allow dogs into a select few of the cabins on board, so it may be that in the future we can take Finn with us, and travel up to Shetland after all.

Dragon shawl pin

When I dropped the wardrobe on my foot, my sister came to check on me, and take me to A&E.  She also brought this gorgeous gift for me!  I've no idea how long she'd been holding onto it for, as for obvious reasons we've not seen a lot of each other in the last 2 years.  I really wanted to be able to wear it at Wool Monty, but it was way too hot for wearing a shawl!  

It's a shawl pin carved from wood, with the loop carved to resemble the stylised wings of a dragon, and the pin shaped to form the head, neck, and tail, and also so that when it's in place, the "head" of the dragon faces forwards, giving a 3 dimensional effect.  I love it!

Knit and Purl can change the world pastel print hoodie

I'm sorry that it's all creased so that you can't see the print properly, but I had to ask Stephen to take the photo, and he couldn't see anything that was further than 20cm from the end of his nose at the time, so all he could do was point my phone in roughly the right direction, and hope!

You already know that I love SkeinHead, but because of this hoodie, I love them even more!  It's remarkably difficult these days to find a decent zip up hoodie.  The prevailing fashion seems to be for pull over hoodies.  With the state of my shoulders though, getting the pull over type hoodies on and off was getting increasingly difficult.  I had managed to find a single zip up hoodie that I liked, and that was available in plus sizes, but I needed another option for when that is in the wash.  And this is it!  snuggly, and soft, and cosy, and representing punk rock knitters everywhere!

Finn

Yep, He's still the cutest thing in the whole world, according to me!

Finn the cocker spaniel, staring at a gently nibbled pink French fancy 

Even though he's a cake thief, and had attempted to steal this French Fancy off his daddy!

Soggy Doggy in the bath

Even though he's a disgusting hound, who likes to roll in things that smell like the Bog of Eternal Stench, and swim in muddy ponds, and eat goose poop!

Snoozy pup using his penguin as a pillow

But just look at him!  He's so adorable!

Adoring pup resting his chin in Mummy's lap

Look at those adoring eyes!  So much love!

It's not at all likely that I'm holding a biscuit, and that's what he's looking at with such devotion!!!

Penguins!

I know this is the only thing some of you come here for...

Chocolate orange cake bars, with a penguin in the wrapper

No, I did not buy these just because they had a penguin on the wrapper, what on Earth would make you think that?!?

4 plushy penguins snuggling in an armchair

My very lovely friend Tony claims that these fell into his basket by accident, therefore they must have wanted to be with me.  I think that the 3 at the back look very smug about this turn of events.  The one at the front seems more concerned...

Big eyed plush penguin, with a glittery beak, and a silly tartan hat

It's my step-dad's birthday at the start of January, and we usually try to get the family all together for a meal out somewhere.  Finn can't really come to these events, firstly as there's just too many people in one house, and secondly as my Step-dad has somewhat out-dated views on how dogs should be treated.  Views that both I, and Finn, disagree with.  So, rather than have a big argument about it, Finn gets to stay with his daddy and be fed more treats than he should, because his Daddy is a big softy, and I get to spend time in motorway service stations unattended...

If you leave me alone in a motorway service station, the chances are that I will come out with a penguin, as well as a croissant and a hot chocolate.  That is exactly what happened here.

Pink penguin stickers

So, I was looking online for a signet ring, of the type that you use to stamp a wax seal...

No, I'm not entirely sure how that ended up with my buying penguin stickers either, but it did.

And that, my dearest darlings, is it!  Excepting the Wool Monty, I am now up to date!

All being well, we shall finally escape from the clutches of Eye-mageddon within a month or so.  Once Stephen has been discharged from eye care, and has procured glasses that work for him, I am most sincerely hoping that our life will finally begin to settle down into something calmer and more predictable.  Of course, I know our luck, so I'm not actually expecting that to happen... but if by some miracle it does, I should be back with another update in a month or so, and that will include details of my day at The Wool Monty.

Until then, take care, and keep safe.

It's a new record! - Also, Happy New Year!

Five. Whole. Months.

I'm so sorry!

I promise, I will explain why!  But first I need to say that this post will be different from most, as the only way that I can make sense of everything without writing the equivalent of War and Peace is to split this update into 2 parts.  The first, this one, will cover all explanations, life updates, political rants, etc. plus my usual first post of the year update on goals for the year (I know...) I offer fair warning now that it's going to be "Wall of text crits you for 9000".  The second post, which hopefully will be written tomorrow, will cover all the regulars, and actual knitting and penguins content.

So, if you're only here for the pretty pictures, you're fairly safe skipping this entire post.  If you want to know what the Hells happened, read on...

Content warning: There will be a couple of images that some people might find disturbing, as they show details of injury, eyes, and feet.

Eye-mageddon!

Yes, it does need a heading that big.  The last 6 months of our lives have been dominated by the health of Stephen's eyes.

Stephen, a white man with long hair and a ginger beard, with a surgical dressing over his right eye.

I'm starting with a less shocking image, as I know that when I share this on Facebook later, this will be the image that comes up on the post.  This is my poor love immediately after surgery on his eye.  I think this was at the end of November, just before his birthday.  If you're a regular reader of my blog, you'll already know that he suffered a retinal detachment at that time.  Last I wrote about though, Stephen was recovering well, and back at work.

Of course, our life couldn't be that simple. After New Year, Stephen was back to work, although still working from home, as he hadn't had his final post-op check and been discharged as fit to go back on site.  On Monday 10th January he felt as though his vision was distorted again.  Both his boss, and the eye clinic advised that he had it checked out, just to be sure, so I drove him into Sheffield and left him at the hospital.  Where they couldn't find anything wrong. Reassured, we went home.

The next day he was still concerned, as the distortion was still there.  He has issues with anxiety at the best of times, so I advised him to go back to the eye clinic.  He didn't want to waste their time, or my energy, but I was determined that either he be properly reassured, or get any issue dealt with straight away, so I convinced him to go back.

I'm glad I did, as this time they discovered a second retinal tear.  This one was in a different place to the first, an artefact of the healing process, where as scar tissue forms over the original tear and repair, it causes tension across the whole retina, and can lead to further tears.  The scary issue with this is, if your body heals in a way that causes this stress on the retina, it means you are much more likely to suffer further retinal tears in the weeks and months following surgery,  Only once you're fully healed does your risk drop to normal levels.

Anyway, surgery was arranged, and performed on this second tear.  Except this was the second surgery on the same eye in less than 2 months, both under local anaesthetic in order to speed recovery.  It took much more anaesthetic than normal for Stephen to be able to tolerate this surgery, and afterwards the surgeon described his eye as "very angry"!

Here's what it looked like a few days later, after the dressing had come off:

A close up of part of Stephen's face, showing his right eye, the iris is grey, the "white" is bright red, the eyelids slightly bruised and swollen.

After retinal surgery, it's necessary to do something called "posturing", that is holding your head in a particular position for 50 minutes out of every 60.  This is because during the surgery they remove the vitreous from within the eye, and inject a bubble of gas to put pressure on the inside of the retina and hold it against the macula while it heals. You have to keep your head in the right position to make sure that the bubble is putting pressure in the right place.  You can't "save up" your few minutes of free movement in order to have an hour of normal movement in return for 5 hours holding still either!  After both previous retinal surgeries - that on his left eye in 2019, and the first on his right eye at the end of November - Stephen was fortunate in that the position he had to maintain was completely upright, or he was allowed to lie on is left side overnight.

This 3rd tear though was different.  He had to lie on his right hand side, for 50 minutes out of every 60, for a full week.  Staying in the same position for that long gets painful.  He couldn't see well enough to read, or watch tv, as while the gas bubble is still in your eye, you're completely blind in that eye.  It slowly shrinks and dissipates over the course of about a month. So he couldn't distract himself from worrying about the likelihood of further tears, the pain of more surgeries, the diminishing returns on repeated surgeries... It was genuinely terrifying.  Oh, and there was the eye drops!  3 sets of drops, 4 times a day - cold, stingy, and "tasty" we called them, as every. single. time. poor Stephen had to endure the sensation of cold on his eyes from the first set of drops, followed by painful stinging from the second, and a vile taste in the back of his mouth from the 3rd.  Bearing in mind that we'd only finished the 4 weeks of the same drops a few days before Christmas, and here we were less than 2 weeks into the new year doing it all again!  We survived by listening to Critical Role back episodes.  I think those nerdy ass voice actors actually saved our sanity, if not our lives!

So, we endured 2 consecutive retinal tears.  Stephen was acutely aware that he'd had to take a LOT of time off work sick to recover, and was really looking forward to getting back into a big new project. He just needed new glasses, as obviously his prescription had changed due to the surgeries.  He went to the opticians, and they said he'd need varifocals now, so they'd take a little longer to make, and cost a fair bit more, but that's fair enough, and worth it to be able to see properly again.  So we waited, Stephen did his best to work with his old glasses, we figured life would be back to normal by the start of March.

We should have known better.  

Stephen picked up his new glasses, and tried them on in the opticians.  He could barely discern any difference between wearing them or not.  The optician reassured him that sometimes it takes a while to get used to varifocals, that in a week or so he'd get used to which part of the lens to look through.  A week later it was clear that this was not happening, so another drive into Sheffield to the opticians, who took one look at Stephen's eyes and informed him that he has cataracts.  Cataracts that were not present, or not a problem, 3 weeks earlier.  In 3 weeks, he'd lost 3 dioptres of visual acuity.

We knew that cataracts are an almost ubiquitous side effect of retinal surgery, but usually they take several years to form.  Not 3 weeks.  As they're usually slow growing, and more common in older people, and the NHS is, and has been, chronically underfunded by successive cynical governments intent on breaking it in order to make a profit-making system seem appealing to the voting populace, and because covid has, and continues to, disrupt every aspect of healthcare, the waiting list for cataract surgery on the NHS is over 2 years. In less than 2 years, without surgery, Stephen will be legally blind.

Fortunately, he has private health insurance through his work.  He never expected to have to use it.  So he started doing what was necessary to find out if this surgery would be covered, getting referrals, choosing a surgeon etc.

He chose a surgeon based in Doncaster, as although they are a cataract specialist, they have a secondary specialisation in retinal surgery.  We thought this gave them a good chance of being able to deal with any complications in Stephen's case.  We got an appointment for the end of April. All the while Stephen's vision is noticeably deteriorating, yet he's still doing his best to work (from home obviously, he can't drive, and neither Finn nor I are allowed on site).  He's also conscious of the toll all of this takes on my body, so he's trying to do as much as he can to ease that burden, which includes walking Finn most days.  As long as he remains on familiar paths around the village, he thought he'd be fine.  Until he encountered a loose rock in the middle of the path that he couldn't see, and ended up face-planting in the middle of the road.  I collected him from a street bench near where he'd fallen, and took him to A&E, where he remained for many tedious hours, unable to read the screen that showed updates on expected waiting times.  

Stephen's swollen ankle and bruised foot.

Fortunately, nothing was broken.  It was just sprained, but obviously it needed resting for a while!

Finn attempting to steal the knitted patchwork blanket that is wrapped around a bag of frozen peas on Stephen's foot and ankle.

Finn had little sympathy for his daddy's injury. I used one of his blankets to protect Stephen's skin from freezer burns when he was icing his damaged foot and ankle with a bag of frozen peas.  Finn just stole his blanket back!

This meant that Stephen was using crutches to walk when I drove him to Doncaster, and left him at the hospital while I tried to find a suitable place to take Finn. 

Lakeside Lake, Doncaster, water bird nesting season, many swans!

Finn the cocker spaniel trying to reach coots in a lake.

I chose poorly, not knowing the area.  I chose what looked on the map to be a lakeside park.  In fact, it's even called Lakeside Lake (WTH?) Unfortunately it's about half new development site, and half nature reserve.  I'm sure it will be gorgeous when it's finished, but for half of it the wildlife was utterly un-protected from marauding dogs (or people!) with birds nesting just centimetres from the shore of the lake, which in turn was just a few metres from the footpath. The other half is a building site.  I didn't dare let Finn off the lead for a second, otherwise he'd have been beaten to death by a million maternally outraged swans, or he'd have eaten a duckling.

I made it about 2/3 of the way around the lake before Stephen called, so he had to wait a while for me to get back to him.  At which point he informed me that the surgeon in Doncaster did not feel able to take on his case, as it was too complicated and risky.  They'd recommended a surgeon in Sheffield, at the same eye clinic that Stephen had had his retinal surgeries at, as the facilities there are better, and Doncaster surgeon felt that a retinal specialist with experience in cataract surgery would be better for Stephen.

So, another round of phone calls to find out if this second surgeon was on the Insurance company's approved list, and if a re-referral would still be covered. Honestly, I've no idea how people in countries without socialised medicine cope!  The sheer amount of admin necessary at a time when you're in no fit state to be dealing with extra stress!

By this point it was almost May, my own doctor is concerned about a number of issues with my own health that I'd been putting off attempting to address until covid was "over".  I didn't dare tell Stephen that I was being tested for cancer markers until the tests fortunately came back negative.  We're trying to arrange appointments around each other, and my diary is packed with letters asking me to book appointments that I daren't arrange until I know when Stephen's are going to be, both of our cars are due their MOT's before the end of May (for anyone outside the UK, an MOT is a legally required annual road worthiness check), and several events that we planned pre-covid, that have had to be rescheduled, are rapidly approaching, and we don't know if we can make them, even though we've been looking forward to them for 2 years!

We were still waiting to hear about an appointment with the Sheffield surgeon, but instead he contacted Stephen to say that he doesn't feel able to perform the surgeries either!  Apparently he has access to the notes on the NHS system from Stephen's retinal surgeries, since he works in the same clinic, and after reading them he felt that even the facilities he has access to might not be sufficient.  He recommended yet another specialist, this one in Manchester.  This one is one of the top complex cataract specialists in the UK.  To find anyone with more experience, and equivalent facilities, we'd have to go to London.  Another round of phone calls and discussions with the insurance company, to be sure surgeon number 3 is on their approved list, and arranging for yet another assessment. By this point I was praying to deities I don't even believe in to please, PLEASE let this be what we need.

Then I dropped a wardrobe on my foot.

This needs us to backtrack a bit.  Stephen's parents live on Yell, one of the Shetland islands.  They usually visit for several weeks in spring/early summer, but for obvious reasons, we haven't seen them in 3 years.  During that time, I have officially moved in with Stephen, meaning that all of my stuff has also moved in to this house.  Because I moved during a global pandemic, my friends were able to help by bringing my stuff from one side of Sheffield to the other, but they couldn't help me unpack, or sort through everything. I managed to build myself a yarn cave, rearrange the entire house so that Stephen has an adequate office to work from home, and turn Stephen's junk room into a useable bedroom for us before all of my stuff arrived.  I had no energy left to deal with boxes that I hadn't packed, so I had no idea what things were in which box, and they'd been stacked at random in the spare bedroom.

The spare bedroom is the room that Stephen's parents sleep in when they visit.

I wish I'd taken photos of just how packed it was with stuff!  Over the 2 years that covid controlled our lives, I managed to sort out about 10% of the boxes.  Suddenly, I had less than a month to get them all out of the way, and turn the spare room back into a bedroom, while at the same time juggling medical appointments from every angle. Plus, Stephen couldn't help much, as he couldn't see well enough, and all of his energy is going into trying to keep working, when he has to have his nose practically touching the screen in order to read an email!  

To give you some idea of how bad it was, this is the current state of our dining room, where any boxes I didn't get a chance to go through have been placed while Stephen's parents are here with us.  I reckon I've now sorted about 80% of the former contents of the spare room, yet this remains to be dealt with:

A room half full of boxes, piled on the floor, and on a table that is folded down and pushed to one side. 

To help me organise everything in those boxes, I needed more storage.  The wardrobe in our bedroom had definitely seen better days, and wasn't terribly stable, and the space next to the wardrobe had become a dumping ground for anything we couldn't be bothered to put away properly. So I ordered a new wardrobe, and shelves, and set about demolishing the old wardrobe...

Obviously, Stephen couldn't drive me to A&E, and I couldn't drive myself! I tried to convince myself that it was just tissue damage, and I didn't need to go to hospital.  But then it started swelling up.  I called my sister, thinking her medical knowledge (She's a nurse, and ward sister) might save me the trip to hospital.  Instead she came over, looked at my foot, and took me to A&E herself.  

I could, just about, walk on the foot, but not well.  I own crutches and walking sticks already, because EDS means there are often times when I need them just because I woke up that day.  So I took my crutches with me. but I'm also getting physio for a persistent shoulder injury that's often bad enough that I can't dress myself.  Have you ever tried to use crutches when you've got bursitis in your shoulder?  I can promise you that it's not fun!  My sister eventually convinced me to swallow my stubborn pride, and get in an NHS wheelchair.  Which I then sat in for 3 hours, until the triage nurse came out and announced to the entire waiting room that the current waiting time was 9 hours.  I hadn't eaten, I was in pain from my foot, but also increasingly in pain from being sat unable to move and fidget the way I usually do to ease the pain of EDS, it was already after 9:30pm, and I just couldn't deal with waiting around in increasing pain until 4am, knowing that only then would I be sent for an x-ray, and then I'd have to wait for several more hours to get the results.  I decided to assume that my injury would be no worse that Stephen's sprained ankle.

You may not wish to see this:

A badly bruised and very swollen foot, with an angular scab where the edge of a very large lump of wood hit.

Now, I'm no doctor, but even I know that when the injury is near the ankle, but the bruising and swelling covers the entire foot, and the darkest, blackest bruises are at the base of a toe, it's probably more than just tissue damage!  The fact that it's now 5 weeks later, and my foot still hurts quite badly if I press on the top of it suggests that I probably did break something.  I probably did not make wise choices when I decided to rest this for about 3 days, then carry on as though it had never happened.

At this point I have to thank our dear friends Ian and Jo, as the day after my injury, they came over to our house and finished dismantling the old wardrobe, and built the new one that Ikea delivered that day.  Then they forgave us for missing their joint birthday party 2 days later as well.

New wardrobe and shelving unit in our bedroom.

Again, I wish I had before photos so you could see what a vast improvement this is!

One week after the wardrobe incident, Stephen's parents arrived.  I hadn't quite finished all of the cleaning, as they arrived about 3 hours earlier than we expected, but at least the house was tidy, and their room was ready for them. 10 days after that, Stephen had an appointment with the specialist in Manchester.

Let me assure you that driving 120-odd miles in a manual car, with a broken foot, is not a comfortable experience. I managed, and I managed to find a far more suitable place to take Finn for a walk and a play while we waited this time!

Finn looking for treats in my bag and hoodie, on a picnic blanket, on the grassy bank of the river Bollin.

It's a very good thing that we've discovered this park, as thankfully, this surgeon is willing to perform the surgeries.  He won't do both eyes at the same time, so I have to drive Stephen to Manchester 4 times in the next month, twice for surgeries, and twice for post-op checks.  Finally the end is in sight! (pun entirely intended). If all goes well, Stephen will be able to see well enough to drive by my birthday in mid July.

Of course, we know our luck, especially on this issue, so we're already expecting Posterior Capsular Opacification (the clinical name for secondary cataracts) to appear with unprecedented speed, because of course they will!  But at least the treatment for those is quick and easy, and since roughly half of cataract surgery patients develop them in the 6 months following surgery, we're absolutely expecting Stephen to do so.

When you add to all of this the state of the climate, war in Ukraine, the continuation of other wars that have been going on for longer, just further away, and with less significant impact on us, 1/3 of children in the UK in food poverty, but a UK government who think it's OK to party while the entire country is making sacrifices, and our monarch mourns her husband alone, the erosion of rights, and yet more mass shootings in the US, the Elephant In The Room that is the impact of Brexit, and the precarious nature of the border in Ireland, none of which have ceased to cause me to cry, and rant, and despair of humanity, just because I've had my own troubles to deal with, I think you should be able to see why my first blog post of 2022 is late.  I haven't had the time, energy, or mental capacity to sit down and write one.

Some stuff I have done

I haven't been entirely unproductive in the last 5 months though.  None of these things are knitting, and only one of them is even yarn craft related really, but here's a few little things that I have achieved:

3 resin buttons, one red, one sparkly purple, one opalescent black.

If you read my last post, you will have seen that Stephen gave me some resin crafting materials for Christmas.  One of the things I was experimenting with during the brief period that his eyes were mostly healed and working at the start of January was making my own buttons.  These are 3 of the ones I tried. My favourite is the black with the iridescent flakies in it, I think it looks like a black opal!  

All of the resin kit got packed away as soon as Stephen's right retina tore for the second time.  I wear a respirator when I work with resin, but during the winter keeping windows open to fully clear the air once I'm finished isn't an appealing option, and I wasn't willing to risk any residual resin fumes making Stephen's eyes any worse.

Purple knitted fingerless gloves with a grey skull motif. Sections of the fingers have worn through, and repaired with bright pink yarn.

I can't remember if this was before Christmas, or in January, but I'm pretty sure I haven't shown this before.  I made these gloves for Kelly years ago.  He wears them for running in the winter, but some of the fingers have either worn through, or caught on something and been damaged.  He likes them, so rather than have me knit an entire new pair, he asked if I could darn the damaged areas. He liked the idea of using a contrasting yarn so that the repair would be visible.  I've never done this complex a repair on anything knitted before, and I'm pretty pleased with how they came out!

A very large drawstring bag made with penguin patterned fabric.

The same bag open to reveal multiple inner pockets, filled with different types of dice.

I mentioned earlier that we watch/listen to Critical Role.  If you've ever seen it, you may know that Laura Bailey is definitely what is known in the Table Top Role Playing Game world as a "Dice Goblin".  That is, someone who collects/hoards dice.  Way more dice than even the most avid gamer could ever actually need.  Laura keeps her dice in several Dice Bags of Hoarding.  While I would very much like to own one of the official Critical Role bags, I cannot justify the cost. I do however have a fairly sizeable collection of dice myself, and since Christmas I also have the capability and intention of making more.  So despite my abysmal sewing skills, I dug out my penguin patterned fabric, and set about making my own version.

A counted cross stitch project of a crab, in progress, on a small wooden frame.

This isn't something that I've done this year, but it is something that I've found this year. During my sorting of the many boxes of my stuff, I discovered this, which I am pretty sure is my oldest WIP.

I started this cross stitch project before I married my ex-husband.  We married in August 2000.  This project is probably more than half as old as I am!  I think I still have the book with the chart in, so it's even conceivable that one day I might finish it!

Goals for 2021 - How did I do?

I usually start the year by taking a look at my goals from the year before, then setting some new goals for the year to come.  This year was no different, except that I only got as far as writing them in my blog notebook, and never managed to type them up until now.  

These are straight from my notebook, as written in the first few days of January 2022:

2021 Goals:

* No potentially upsetting social media after 9pm.

I did pretty well at sticking to this one, and I do think that it helped with my overall mental health.  I allowed myself Ravelry and Pintrest, as long as I avoided any high risk boards and groups.  I don't Tweet, because Twitter is a cesspool, so I was OK there.  I avoided Facebook and instagram, and set my phone to only give me news updates in the mornings.

I've not managed to maintain the 9pm discipline this year, but I have found that I check the socials less frequently than I used to, and I'm far less likely to scroll mindlessly for ages.

* Cool Sheep

Miraculously, I did pretty well at this!  

My self-imposed rules allowed me my Made by Penguins monthly yarn club, my first post-lockdown yarn show mini-splurge at Bakewell Wool Gathering, anything I needed that I couldn't find in my stash for a project that someone else requested I make for them, and my yarny advent calendar.

I bought only 1 skein that Third Vault Yarns was selling reduced price to clear stock, 7 balls of commercial sock yarn, 2 of which were for specific projects, and 3 mini-skeins from Ring-a-Rosie, just because I hadn't seen her in so long!

I did receive 1 full skein, and one mini-skein as gifts, and a full skein that I was permitted to keep the majority of, after knitting swatches for the dyer too.

All together, I added 9400m of yarn to my stash.  According to Ravelry, I used 9762m.  That's a net use of stash, so I'm pleased with that!

---Actual shock, and shame---

I've just done a quick ballpark of how much yarn I added to my stash in 2020, and it's in excess of 45,000m!  I know it was an unusually stressful year, and I bought a couple of sweater quantities that I wouldn't usually, and I accepted 9 balls from a friend's de-stash, but Holy Jesus, Mary, and Joseph, and all his little carpenter friends!!!!!!!

* WIP-down.  Reduce number of WIPs to single figures, and keep it there!

Genuine success! I ended 2021 with just 7 WIPs, and one completed project awaiting the space for blocking! (obviously I'm only talking about yarn related projects here, so pre-historic cross stitch doesn't count!)

* Sort Stash.

Nope. I mean, it's all in one place, and it's organised roughly, but I still haven't sorted it, arranged it neatly, and updated Ravelry with current storage references.

* Publish Advent Sweater pattern.

Not even close.  I made changes to the pattern, and knit up a second prototype, but I got no further than that.  Grading was my stumbling block.  I'm going to have to spend some time educating myself in how to properly grade a sweater to make it size inclusive.  I learned enough last year to realise how gargantuan a task that is going to be, but not enough to start work on it.

* Re-open Etsy shop.

This was always a stretch goal to be honest.  I can't do this until I have the rest of my house in order.  I can't keep track of stock when I've got nowhere safe to store it!

* Sort house out.

Nope.  As I said above, I was slowly nibbling away at the pile of boxes in the spare room, but I barely made a dent in the overall task.

Goals for 2022:

* Learn to grade a size inclusive garment.

* Publish Advent Sweater pattern.

* Sort house out.

* Knit more than I buy.

* Make progress on the Mitred Squares Blanket.

The first 2 goals on this list have already been abandoned.  I haven't had the time, the energy, or the money to do what is necessary, and there isn't enough of the year left to do it properly this year, by the time you include test knitting, tech editing, and any adjustments that might be needed.  Perhaps next year the Fates will be kinder to me, and allow me to finally achieve this goal!

Finn snoozing and cuddling up to his daddy.

As this post has been decidedly text heavy, I thought I'd sign off with this beautiful photo of Finn, in the dawn pre-light, snuggling up to his daddy in our bed.

Thank you for your patience my dears.  I shall be back with a proper update.  Hopefully very soon.